Something I used to do for Deadspin (with a head nod toward this great old post on Runner's World's website).

Attacked by child-murderer

Attacked by man who attempted to remove her pants

Advertisement

Bitten by coyote

“Beaten By Men With Sticks”

Bitten by spider and infected with flesh-eating virus

Sponsored

Chased by mountain lion

Followed by emu

Fondled by man who yelled "April Fool's"

Found “dead body” (actually pig carcass)

Advertisement

Found headless goat on beach

Genitals exposed to (Texas)

Advertisement

Genitals exposed to (New York)

Hit by train

Rescued suicidal man

Advertisement

Robbed of phone and clothes by two women

Robbed at gunpoint in the middle of the afternoon

Advertisement

Robbed near Rose Bowl

Victimized by serial fondler

Advertisement

Wanted by police for jogging naked

Won right to jog naked